That is SO MySpace...

To our dearest readers,

As some of you may have noticed, we Diamond Headers lack what most people call "a life." While most college students may be out partying or even (God forbid) studying, my apartment mates and I occupied ourselves with an activity that fully exhibits our fear of productivity.

Yes, you guessed it! We spent our night digitally capturing ourselves in the most hipster/emo/MySpace way we knew how.

Ladies and Gentlemen, the results...





Impressed? Yes, for those of you who are aspiring MySpacers/Hipsters/emo Facebookers, I shall provide you with some valuable tips on taking the most excellent pseudoartisic pictures:

1. Play with lighting! The more irregular the lighting the better. Hint: Drape brightly colored cloth over your regular desk or floor lamp or make the light face a different way.

2. Create shadows. This is going along with the first tip. Place the light in such a way that 55% or more of your face is indiscernible. This symbolizes the darkness that clouds over your troubled soul.

3. Attach headphones to noggin area. This could mean nesting on your ears or cradling your neck. Generally, the bigger the headphones, the better. The headphones undoubtedly will be streaming indie music.

4. Sepia or Black&White filter. Obviously, any picture taken in sepia or b&w HAS to be deemed artistic right?! RIGHT!

5. Mirror mirror on the wall. The multiple angles represent your struggle with duality. Oh the internal conflict!

6. Make use of props. Cigarettes, musical instruments, art/magazine cut-outs in background (attempts at social commentary=bonus), emo glasses, "intellectual" books (i.e. any non-HP books or Oprah's Book Club...and make sure the camera captures the book title so your fans can be amazed at your literary proficiency),etc.

7. If you have hair, make use of it. Meaning, the more of your face your side-swept bangs (fake it if you don't have 'em) covers, the better. It will give your whole face a sultry, enigmatic look.

8. Black hoodies. You know the drill. No need to explain.

9. Location is everything! Bathrooms (inside bathtub, on top of toilet), closets, street side, staircase, corners...Shady places are money.

and finally, our last and MOST IMPORTANT RULE...

10. NEVER LOOK DIRECTLY INTO THE CAMERA. Imagine the camera to be the devil (or Martha Stewart... same person?) if need be. Making eye contact with the camera is strictly prohibited in said pictures. One major exception is if you are taking a close up of your eye area only.


With these tips handy, you can be sure to be accepted into the ultra-exclusive MySpace community! Enjoy and Godspeed!


Much platonic love,
Mr. T